Studies suggest that self-criticism can shut down the learning centers of the brain.
That harsh voice in your head, not just snatches away your mental peace, but also deeply impacts your performance, confidence, and brain functions. The voice magnifies your fears and never talks about your strengths.
Your inner critic does not acknowledge the things you are doing right and it rarely appreciates your efforts. While your inner critic is not a healthy companion, it is not necessarily your enemy. It is your inner voice that will either fuel your success or your misery. It can help you recognize the areas where you need to improve; however, if that voice is too harsh, it can sabotage your confidence and drown you in self-doubts.
Taming your inner critic can help you identify your weaknesses and turn them into your strengths.
Here are some of the most effective ways to tame your inner critic.
9 Power Ways to tame your inner Critic
Practice Positive Self-Talk
Your inner critic howls when you are stressed, anxious and depressed, making you feel worse. So, if you hear that voice in your head on a day when you are not feeling your best, turn towards the mirror of positivity. Think of the things you did right, the days you were at your best, your greatest achievements, your happy moments, and the strengths that helped you get so far.
You can also practice changing the tone of your inner voice. The voice that says ‘I cannot do this actually means ‘You have never done this before. If it says ‘I am getting fat’ it means ‘I should join the gym’. You can change your inner critic into your biggest motivator. Whenever you catch yourself engaging in negative self-talk, replace the negative thoughts with positive affirmations.
Burst the bubble of negativity
There is no way you can stop a thread of thought from entering your mind. Policing your negative thoughts or blocking your thoughts, might not be that helpful. So, next time your critic speaks up, sit in a silent place and see this inner negativity as a black bubble building up. Fill in that bubble with all your negative thoughts and watch the black bubble leave your head.
Once the bubble is full let it get out of your head. Watch it reach the ceiling and burst out into space. Practice this every day to master this habit of letting your negativity out. Your head will feel much lighter and you will be able to focus on the positive things.
Practice Meditation
Meditation is a proven medicine to tackle negativity. It helps you raise your awareness, identify your inner critic, and become mindful of the inner dialogue. Meditation helps you recognize your thoughts before you engage with them.
Studies have shown that meditation is the exercise of the mind that puts you in control. It gives you the power to consciously choose which thoughts you want to give your attention to. Your inner critic does not state the facts; it simply recites the ideas that are already established in your subconscious mind. Meditation will help you reprogram your subconscious mind.
Give a name to your inner critic
This is an effective strategy that many experts ask their patients to practice. Turn your inner critic into a character. You can think of a character that’s funny or one that you don’t like much. Reimagining the voice in your head as their voice and not yours will help you externalize the words and tackle them in a much better way.
You can imagine your inner critic as any annoying character that you don’t like much. You would definitely not like to hang around with that character for long. So, whenever that voice creeps in with all the self-loathing talk, you will find a door to walk away from it.
Cut out the comparisons
Comparisons hurt your self-esteem and self-confidence. From the very childhood, every aspect of a child is compared with their peers. Be it their behavior, academic excellence, extra-curricular achievements, or other interests. The inner critic picks up this dialogue and the comparisons continue long after childhood.
Studies have found that constant comparison is destructive and it can lead to feelings of doubt and dissatisfaction. Especially in the age of social media, constant comparisons have become a very common thing. Don’t fall for the filters. Though it may look perfect on the reels, in real life everyone has their own battles to fight. So, keep the focus on your own journey.
Celebrate the small thrills
Life is a long journey and we all have big milestones to achieve. As such we often miss celebrating the small thrills. Whether it is a problem you solved or a promotion that you got, a course you completed, or a new skill that you learned, celebrate the small thrills of your life. Take yourself out on shopping on the day your salary got credited or go on a self-date.
Prioritize yourself and your happiness over everything. It is not being selfish but expressing self-love. Being in a happy space will help you mute that voice in your head. Take tangible steps to improve, develop self-compassion, and find that happy space.
Don’t be scared to make mistakes
Making mistakes is not as bad as you think it to be. Making mistakes means you are taking chances, gaining experience, and living your life. It is much better than living a life that never took a chance for the fear of making a mistake.
So, look in the mirror as you would look at the 5-year-old self and tell that little child that ‘it’s ok to make mistakes. Life is all about making a mess and then clearing it up while becoming a better version of yourself.
Set realistic goals
Most of us fall into the trap of setting unrealistic goals for ourselves which are unattainable to anyone. Setting unachievable deadlines will not only lead to disappointment but will also push you to take unhealthy means to accomplish them.
Set small achievable goals that are more manageable. Track your improvements along the way and this will help you reach your bigger goals. If not in a month you will be there in a year. Keep your eyes on the goal and give yourself time to reach there. Also, the success of reaching your small goals will motivate you to keep going.
Stop ruminating
It is human nature to keep replaying the same cassette. You might be tempted to replay the events of the past over and over in your head. Reminding yourself of the mistakes of your past, the hurt that you have endured, and the embarrassment of your actions will bring you nothing but pain.
Whenever you find yourself ruminating, distract yourself with an activity. Go out for a walk, clean your room, talk to an old friend, or watch a light video. This will help you put a pause on critical thinking before it spirals your emotions out of control.
Your Takeaway!
No matter who you are or how successful you are, every person has got an inner critic sitting in their head. It is like an annoying second personality that talks about all the things that we don’t want to hear. Though you might not like the tone of its voice, you must listen to your critic to identify your weaknesses and work on them.
Learning to be self-compassionate is a lifelong journey. Things might not change in a day or a week but if you keep practicing these tips with conviction, you will be able to tame that voice and turn your critic into a fan.
