Role-Reversal: Understanding the New Trend of Women as Breadwinners in India and its Impact on Society

As women walk at par to their male counterpart, men too should stand up to be her true partner. Only a few truly evolved modern families in the society are understanding this need for change and the trend of Role-Reversal.

Probably a few thousand years ago, humans on earth smartly gauged their strengths and bifurcated their jobs. The sturdy men have endowed the tasks of hunting-gathering while smart women held the home together. They did not divide their role just based on their gender rather it was a calculated call of capabilities.

Even after rolling a hundred centuries, that has witnessed tectonic transformations in every dimension, human behaviour still clings to these primitive logics. The body and brain evolved but mentality failed to cope up. We are still stuck in a cube of customs that no longer make sense in the modern scape. When women are emerging to be equally capable, if not more, to be the breadwinner, man too should get the privileges and responsibilities of supporting the home.

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The beginning of a revolution

Early in my childhood days, I had seen many small-time contractors, jobless persons and graduates who did not want to work. They hunted for a government school teacher and married them as their insurance policy. 

People used to bitch about them as they thought a man who could not feed his wife and children is not man enough. “Udyogam Purusha Lakshana”, a man has to go for work. This thinking has resulted in clashes of egos. And in worse cases, the man would resort to abuse and beating to vent out frustration and assert his dominance.

A real anecdote

Fortunately, times have twirled, at least for some. Recently, I was counselling a patient. She was highly successful yet unhappy. Bitterness blanketed her face and anger spat fumes from her mouth. Her dark circles narrated the stories of her sleepless nights and her messy hair was evidence of self-negligence.

The history

I  asked her calmly and compassionately what was bothering her. She said, “ Doctor, I married an electrical engineer. He tried his luck in many jobs, but could not find a spot in the corporate rat race. After going through the physical and emotional trauma of finding a job, he finally gave up all hopes. Its been 5 years now that he doesn’t have a job title.

But this does not mean that my man does no work. In fact, he is as strong a pillar as I am in fostering the family. He takes good care of our children. Prepares our meal, looks after my parents. He precisely picks and drops the children to school and even drops me to the cab stop. He has showered me with immense love and respect.”

“We have happiness at home and it feels like paradise to go back to such a happy space.” She took another pause, rubbed her nose and said, “but the society and their mentality is our problem. People around me tease me and now they have started to say things to my children. I have no option to lie that my husband works from home. Our happiness is jinxed by the society we live in.”

I listened with utmost attention, and then replied, your story sounds exactly out of the movie, “Ki & Ka” by R. Balki. This is an emerging trend of Role-Reversal and people with soon gulp this truth too. And you are the brave lot of this generation who is pioneering this transformation. This initiative of Role-Reversal would make your child’s life much better. 

Role-Reversal – a woman’s saviour

Today’s working women bear an unfair burden of managing the house, the kids, her job and even the man-child all alone. The simple reason society prints, “It’s not a man’s job”! A man cooking his food or washing the dishes is deemed as a demeaning task. 

This is one of the main reason for the increase in divorces in the country. A woman who is self-sufficient won’t bow down to such selfish and unrealistic customs. Teaching a man, the basic skills of survival is as essential as a girl’s education.

Also Read:Why women need more sleep than men?

Role-Reversal – a man’s sigh

Though role reversal is often seen as a woman’s weapon, it is equally important for the men. Men also suffer from undue pressure of getting a good job and securing a luxurious life. This has often broken their castles of dreams and kept them from pursuing their passion. 

It is unfair to bug them with the financial necessities when they have the least interest in a day job. They could be amazing artists, writers, actors or homemakers who feel strangled in the corporate suit. Such sick customs causes mental agony, depression and even suicide among men.

The art of Standing apart, blending in

Here are a few tips to follow the gut without breaking your heart!

Practice Meditation – Meditation mutes the unnecessary noise plaguing your mind. A higher understanding of life makes unnecessary things matter less and brings the main meaning in focus. It endows an infectious positivity that works as a shield to every negative vibe thrown your way

Find your tribe – Your tribe is your strength. Find people who concur with your thoughts, ideals and lifestyle. Surrounding yourself with such people sure makes life a smooth ride.

Acceptance is divine – Once you embrace your circumstances with an open heart, it really does not matter what others think, feel or say about it. But the only thing important is that you should be convinced!

Indulge in happiness – Make happiness your habit and nothing can snatch your peace! Smile a lot, laugh out loud, let tears roll but only of happiness.

Remember, it’s the right thing – Knowing that you are doing the right thing gives you immense power to fight the entire world that shouts standing in the darkness of ignorance. That’s how the philosophers and seers won battles and brought changes in society.

Remember, both the wheels of a vehicle should be parallel for the car to be on track!