Do you fear to mix with people for being negatively evaluated by them? If the fear is excessive, then you are suffering from social anxiety. People who suffer from social anxiety worry that they will embarrass themselves and will be judged by others. As a result, they show signs of anxiety, shaking, or sweating. Such people avoid social gatherings, parties, job interviews, group conversations, or public speaking. They also fear to talk to other people, talking in front of other people, or even saying ‘no’ to someone.
Signs of social anxiety
Studies suggest that genetic and environmental factors interact to cause social anxiety. When people with social anxiety enter a situation where they fear, they start feeling anxious called the ‘fight-or-flight response’. As a result, they start showing signs of fear and anxiety-like shaking, sweating, heart palpitations, nausea, and sometimes even an upset stomach.
How to cope with social anxiety
Slow breathing
When you are anxious, your breathing rate automatically increases. So you should learn to slow down your breathing rate when you are anxious. This will help to settle down the anxious sensations and help you to focus your mind. This is how you can do it:
Sit down comfortably in front of a watch with a second hand and start to focus your mind on your breathing. Remember to breathe only through your nose. Breathe from your lower stomach, rather than your chest. Relax your stomach as much as possible. Breathe in for 3 seconds and then breathe out for 3 seconds. Each time you breathe out, tell yourself to relax. Continue doing this for 5 minutes.
Try exercise and yoga
Research shows that physical activities like jogging, walking or doing yoga can help to cope with your anxiety. Progressive muscle relaxation like flexing and releasing your muscles will also help in overcoming anxiety. Certain specific yoga poses are known to work wonders on reducing anxiety. Yoga also helps to calm you down. The yoga poses that involve deep breathing lowers your blood pressure and heart rate.
Assertiveness
People with social anxiety disorder lack assertiveness. They will benefit by learning how to be more assertive through self-help strategies. Communicate your point of view or your needs in a calm and relaxed manner, while respecting others’ point of view. People with social anxiety struggle to say ‘no’ to others. So by learning to say ‘no’ they will learn to be more assertive.
Non-verbal communication
People with social anxiety tend to have a ‘closed-off’ attitude, which makes them unapproachable. Have a relaxed posture, and talk to people with good eye contact. This will encourage others to respond positively to you, and will also make you more approachable. The confidence in your body posture will help you to become more confident in social interactions.
Verbal communication
You can develop the skills to start a conversation, to keep it going, and to listen attentively. For example, if you want to join a group of people in conversation, first listen to the conversation, and then make a comment on the topic being discussed.
Stop negative thinking
If you suffer from social anxiety, you may tend to misinterpret comments or facial expressions by people and take them as criticisms. You need to see people in a positive way and stop misreading. Stop assuming that other people are thinking negatively about you. Also, don’t assume that the behaviours of others are related to you. For example, don’t assume that your friend is getting bored watching a movie with you.
Face your fears
Don’t avoid the feared situations, don’t hide your anxiety. Face them. Otherwise, in the long run, it will severely limit your life. Moreover, as your fear grows, the number of situations that you fear will also grow.
Gradually, try to expose yourself to the social situations you fear. This will gradually reduce the anxieties that are associated with them.
Don’t make these mistakes
While trying to overcome social anxiety, you may make some mistakes. Let’s point out these mistakes so that you can avoid them. Don’t try to control your anxiety. This may make you more focused on them. Neither should you focus on being perfect? Instead, accept the worst-case scenarios and work on them. Also, remember that social anxiety is not a personality trait. It is a mental health issue, but it does not define who you are.